Warning: this post is a little bit of a rant post because I am frustrated with my health and fitness journey progress and I need to vent. That is part of why I have this blog. So…you know… you’ve been warned. 🙂 It has been a few weeks since I posted about my Fitness Journey and where I am at with that….and it is because my progress is SLOW. At first, I really did SO good with my diet and exercise, it didn’t even really feel hard because I was so motivated! But as time wore on and I started to get used to things, suddenly it got harder. BAM. I didn’t expect that… seriously everything out there says that this gets easier, the first part is the hardest, but I feel like it is harder than it ever was! Even though I don’t necessarily have the cravings anymore (thankfully, that part was true, if you stop eating it you eventually stop craving it!) my stomach must still just be gigantic… because I am HUNGRY. I saw this photo on my phone the other day as I was deleting pictures and I am pretty sure that the puddle of drool that came out of my mouth still isn’t dried up yet- even in this heat outside!
Honestly I think the hardest part of trying to overcome this trial is realizing how many excuses I make. There is always an excuse for why I have gained weight or for why I haven’t been trying as hard to lose weight. And in honesty, they are good reasons- I have had a baby, struggled with mental illness, have a thyroid disorder that makes weight loss difficult, birth control that caused weight gain, I work a full time job, I was a full time student, blah blah blah blah. The list goes on and on, but ultimately, every single one of these “reasons” for not working out or eating right is just another excuse and it has led to so much unhappiness, insecurity, and unhealthiness. I can recognize now that even though I might have reasons, I still had NO excuse for letting it get so carried away.
So- for now- I am still trying. This whole year has been a collage of times where I was super focused on my goals and then not so focused, but this week I have taken up some new inspiration and am trying to start fresh from where I am at. I have made a little bit of progress this year (not as much as hoped, but I’ll take it), and I just need to keep moving forward. Damn this century and the convenience of Instant Gratification for making it so much harder to stay focused and patient! Oh well. I am going to start forcing myself to blog about my health and fitness journey more often because I think it will help me focus on my goals, and who knows, maybe when I am finally happier with how I am and my progress, my story can help someone else out there who is struggling! Thanks for reading my little rant about this! I guess I just feel frustrated that everywhere I read, I see these amazing success stories with people who are so dedicated and they say it was “hard work,” but you never see the parts of the story like this…where 6 months in you are still having insecurity and still craving In N Out. Does that even make sense? So I’m glad you all put up with my ranting! Loves!